I've been suffering a lot mentally and emotionally. So, to try and ease my suffering a little, I took on a graphics project for myself. I came up with something rather spectacular, in my own opinion (most likely not in others opinions) and I hope you like it.

What I came up with is a space-themed abstract work. I called it "Reprieval" because it was an escape from my own present reality. It's a visual trip into the unknown. Infer whatever emotion from it you wish, but to me it represents an emotional explosion.

Well, here's the piece:



I know this isn't very big and, if you wish, you can see the full sized image here: http://beserker1983.deviantart.com/art/Reprieval-72938850

I hope you like it.

Man, things can change

A lot has happened since my most recent post. The woman I had started seeing decided enough was enough a short time ago. I guess it was for the best, anyway. Although I cared greatly for her - and I know she felt the same for me - we had too many different points of view in life. Too, a few things happened that made it harder for us to have a healthy relationship.

We never fussed or argued, save one time, and we enjoyed each time we shared together. There were just outside factors involved and it somehow changed her perspective on the matter.

Whatever, life goes on.

Aside from that, I've found a new profession that I seem to enjoy. Right now, I'm a bar-back at Ray's ESG on Kingston Pike here in Knoxville. It's a nice little place. The job I have is very fast-paced, although it's very free and flexible. I work at my own pace - so long as everything gets done - and have a wonderful time with it. The people I work with are great and treat me with respect. Too, people are constantly bragging about the "good job [I] do." It's nice being appreciated.

I'm making wonderful money; for the first time in my life I go without wanting or needing anything. If I run short on cash, all I need do is wait a day or two until I'm back at work. I make tips daily, so I always have money.

Generally speaking, life has been good to me lately, despite my recent break-up. I can't really complain about things. I'm back on the look-out for a potential lover and hope I'm not single for too long. Aside from that, I'm having the time of my life.

I suppose this will have to do for now. I've got other things I should be doing right now. Have a wonderful day, whomever is reading this right now.

I'm slacking!

I really should keep up with this thing, shouldn't I? With all the things I do on a day-in, day-out basis, it's rather difficult for me to keep on posting. Maybe one of these days I'll have my schedule worked out well enough to keep in practice with posting blogs.

Disregard my previous statements of an "old hope"...

Odd things happen to the hopeless, that's for certain. I mentioned an "old hope" or a flame that had been somewhat rekindled. Well, I found something better ... or someone, I should say. She's wonderful and hope everything goes right with her and I.

Well, as simple as this is, ciao. Got better things to do. ;)

Some peope are unincorrigable.

This is a conversation I had today with someone rather ... disturbing.

(Bear in mind, she's racist. If you want to see her profile for further investigation, go to http://profiles.yahoo.com/redneck_kkk_cowgirl. Please have an open mind when you read this.)



hyponiq2006: You, like all other racist bastards and bitches, need to be shot or find yourself at the losing end of a rope.
redneck_kkk_cowgirl: and who just might you be
hyponiq2006: I am me.
redneck_kkk_cowgirl: a nigger lover i assume
hyponiq2006: Not necessarily.
hyponiq2006: I grew up all over the United States. I've had very good friends of all races and creeds. I've also had worst enemies of the same.
redneck_kkk_cowgirl: well if u aint white,u aint right
hyponiq2006: It is simply more gratifying to judge one by their intelligence and character, not the pigment of their skin.
hyponiq2006: "Right" is a matter of opinion.
redneck_kkk_cowgirl: and the kkk is RIGHT
hyponiq2006: No, it's really not.
hyponiq2006: Murder, false judgment ... these are things capitally punishable per the Bible.
hyponiq2006: You do believe in God, don't you?
hyponiq2006: Well, according to the scriptures, "Judge not lest ye be judged." I'm not a holy roller, but I do believe that the actions we take in this life follow us to the next.
redneck_kkk_cowgirl: LOOK FOOL,UR WASTING YOUR TIME. IM RIGHT,YOUR WRONG,SIMPLE AS THAT
hyponiq2006: No, you're delusional.
hyponiq2006: There's a difference.
hyponiq2006: It's called "self-reinforcing delusion."
redneck_kkk_cowgirl: your stupid
hyponiq2006: Correction ... you're the idiot.
hyponiq2006: For starters, at least I know the difference between "your" and "you're".
hyponiq2006: Don't DARE try to pick apart my intelligence; you don't have the time.
redneck_kkk_cowgirl: little wigger boy
hyponiq2006: "wigger"? Hardly.
hyponiq2006: If I were "wigger", I'd be talking black.
redneck_kkk_cowgirl: cant teat apart something you dont have
hyponiq2006: Considering the fact that you're attacking my person, and I haven't attacked you yet, I'd say that I'm the one with a higher intelligence.
hyponiq2006: That might be a logical assumption.
hyponiq2006: Also considering the fact that I do not judge for I absolutely despise to be judged.
redneck_kkk_cowgirl: you have a person?where?
redneck_kkk_cowgirl: lil boy went to get his mommy
hyponiq2006: Correction, I went to get a glass of tea.
redneck_kkk_cowgirl: from aunt jemima i bet
hyponiq2006: Uh, no, from my refrigerator.
hyponiq2006: Seriously ... enough of this useless banter ...
hyponiq2006: ... why on Earth did you decide to be racist? What happened to you to make you choose such a path?
redneck_kkk_cowgirl: banter
hyponiq2006: "Banter" is synonymous with "argument".
redneck_kkk_cowgirl: because its the only path to follow
hyponiq2006: That's utter bull shit.
hyponiq2006: Why is it the only path to follow?
redneck_kkk_cowgirl: utters are cow tits....duh
hyponiq2006: "utter" also means "absolute".
hyponiq2006:
redneck_kkk_cowgirl: awwwww
hyponiq2006: Get a dictionary before you choose to correct me.
redneck_kkk_cowgirl: your so dumb
hyponiq2006: Nope. I'm perfectly capable of speech.
hyponiq2006: "Dumb" is the inability to make noise.
hyponiq2006: At least, that's the proper definition.
hyponiq2006: Let's try this again ...
redneck_kkk_cowgirl:
hyponiq2006: Why is racism the only path to follow?
redneck_kkk_cowgirl: your a riot
hyponiq2006: you're*
redneck_kkk_cowgirl: no not me, you
hyponiq2006: I was correcting your improper use of "your".
hyponiq2006: Once again, stop attacking me and get to my question.
hyponiq2006: If you cannot answer, you only prove your lack of intelligence.
hyponiq2006: Why is racism the only path to follow?
hyponiq2006: If you cannot answer, not only do you not prove an existence of intelligence, you also prove you don't truly believe your "belief".
redneck_kkk_cowgirl: or im avoiding a very gay person thats boring as hell
hyponiq2006: Yes, I am happy.
hyponiq2006: Boring? Perhaps to someone who cannot fully understand true forms of intelligent conversation.
hyponiq2006:
redneck_kkk_cowgirl: havent heard any yet
hyponiq2006: You haven't been paying attention, then.
hyponiq2006: Then again, you're probably too dense to pay attention. I bet if a bird crossed your path right now, you'd forget you were even in this conversation.
hyponiq2006: Short attention spans are a plague to society.
hyponiq2006: Such as racism.
redneck_kkk_cowgirl: if its a blackbird id shoot it
hyponiq2006: You are impossible.
hyponiq2006: You need to see the movie "American History X".
redneck_kkk_cowgirl: movies are fake like u
hyponiq2006: That might change your perspective a little bit. It's about delusional cowards like you.
hyponiq2006: No, this movie is based on fact.
hyponiq2006: And I'm as real as the processor(s) controlling your computer.
hyponiq2006: I don't care if movies are based on fact or fiction. All stories - real or not - have underlying realities.
redneck_kkk_cowgirl: hollywood wouldnt know reality any more than u do
hyponiq2006: The one reality you need to face is that beneath our skin, we all bleed red. We all are chemically composited of the same materials.
hyponiq2006: Black, white, tan, pale ... it makes no difference. WE all have the same biological composition.
redneck_kkk_cowgirl: i bet youd love to shoot me hun
hyponiq2006: Just because one idiot acts afool doesn't mean every one in that race is an idiot, too.
redneck_kkk_cowgirl: does if you a nigger
hyponiq2006: No, I wouldn't. I believe in "Live and let live". Capital punishment is reserved for the most heinous of crimes.
hyponiq2006: Simply hating someone isn't heinous enough.
redneck_kkk_cowgirl: let me guess,your a liberal
hyponiq2006: I don't claim to be anything.
redneck_kkk_cowgirl: i bet youd love to shoot me hun
hyponiq2006: Except honest and true.
redneck_kkk_cowgirl: im glad because u arent anything
hyponiq2006: No, I would not. How many times must I say it?
hyponiq2006: Well, if I'm nothing, neither are you. After all, you are talking to me.
redneck_kkk_cowgirl: so your a liar to
hyponiq2006: I am not a liar.
redneck_kkk_cowgirl: hyponiq2006: You, like all other racist bastards and bitches, need to be shot or find yourself on the losing end of a rope.
redneck_kkk_cowgirl: your a liar
hyponiq2006: lol
hyponiq2006: No, I didn't say "You, like all racist bastards and bitches, need to be shot BY ME or find yourself on the losing end of a rope." I never said I would do it.
hyponiq2006: I just said that someone should.
hyponiq2006: I don't own or opperate a single firearm.
hyponiq2006: That's a cowardous weapon.
redneck_kkk_cowgirl: no,your the coward
hyponiq2006: Am I?
hyponiq2006: I'm not afraid to respect or love anyone.
hyponiq2006: You are.
hyponiq2006: That makes you the coward.
redneck_kkk_cowgirl: neither am i
hyponiq2006: You run and hide from those you do not know and threaten that they should all be killed or degraded.
hyponiq2006: Have you ever taken the time to truly know those you claim to hate?
hyponiq2006: I doubt it.
hyponiq2006: If you had you would realize they're not all bad.
hyponiq2006: Believe me, I know.
redneck_kkk_cowgirl:
hyponiq2006: You must understand that, genetically speaking, there is no such thing as "truly white".
hyponiq2006: And, for further knowledge, we ALL come from the same place.
hyponiq2006: We all originate from the continent of Africa. The "Adam and Eve" remnants - oldest documented skeletal remains found - were found in the very heart of Africa.
hyponiq2006: Being that a fact, you have the same genetics in your blood as any black man or woman.
hyponiq2006: Don't believe me? Google it. There are all kinds of documents on the matter by leading archaeologists.
hyponiq2006: So, to hate any "nigger" would, in turn, be hating yourself.
hyponiq2006: There is the underlying problem. I truly believe that you don't truly like yourself enough, so, you take it out on an easy target.
hyponiq2006: Hell, there are plenty of racists out there; at least by being racist yourself you have something in common with someone else.
hyponiq2006: A vast amount of people.
hyponiq2006: Sad, it is.
hyponiq2006: Pathetic, too.
hyponiq2006: There are some truly benevolent - and evil, for that matter - people in all races.
hyponiq2006: You really should take a lesson from both sides before you choose to be so ... judgmental.
hyponiq2006: And, for that, I'm done.

Man, time does fly, shit does happen

EDIT 2-28-07: Completely disregard this post! It's all BULL SHIT! :D

Well, in the past month, a lot of things have happened. I found out a lot of things I didn't know, I had a new hope created, an old hope restored, and my life is really starting to look up.

I was online not too long ago in a chat room and some chick just sends me an IM. Well, somehow in the conversation, she mentioned her "rich friend" who was starting a business. I asked her if he needed a Web developer. Well, some information was exchanged and some other stuff said and, viola, I wound up landing one hell of a job opportunity creating a Web site for a guy, creating the infrastructure running his business, and designing and overseeing the construction of the building itself.

That's that "new hope" I was refering to, not the Star Wars movie. That "old hope" I refered to is my ex girlfriend of five years. A few months back when me and my other ex broke up, she was the first one there for me. She's helped me before in the past with other relationships. Well, recently she expressed to me her true feelings for me and how they never changed. She was forced into a situation she didn't want to be in, but had to live in it because of her parents and because of other factors. She pretty much came to the conclusion, however, that she can't have it anymore and -- sooner or later -- she's going to turn the tables and find a way to be with me. I can't wait; I've wished for nothing more ever since she and I split. The whole situation is complicated, so I'm not going into any further detail. I just hope it all works out the way I want it to.

Anyway, I'm going to go now. I need to write in this thing more often. It feels good when I do, although I know nobody reads it.